GOBIBLOG #7

Aloha sports fans,

A month has gone by since my last Blog, the one about Thailand, and all of us have pretty much settled back into our normal routine. All the snow is gone, and the weather has started to get sort of tolerable. Not So Mean Dan is back from his building job in the south so I expect that he’ll finally start working hard on jumps for both Maui Jim (which happens first) and the AEC’s. In two weeks, he’s running a weekend seminar on building jumps which should be interesting. The jumps that are built will be donated to the AEC’s. Thank you Illinois Dressage and Combined Training Association! That’s a really cool offer! Sadly, there is nothing positive to report on my getting the elephant I’ve asked for. I guess it’s time to reconcile myself to the fact that the prospects look pretty damn dim. Big sulk! I might even start refusing cookies which will drive Mom into a frenzy! Serves her right.

Mom was gone for two weekends in March, (more about that later), but she promised that she wont be leaving us again until Rolex week the end of April, whatever “Rolex week” is. She talks like we all should know, but frankly, I don’t have a clue except I know that my friends Janie and Mort run a big competition during that week. I also sort of vaguely remember that Mom ended up in the hospital in Kentucky during Rolex week two years ago while I was having surgery here at home. It’s all kind of fuzzy in my mind, but I think it was a very weird time in my life. Until she leaves again, she’s keeping busy banging away on her computer, (she’s not a bad writer, but her ability pales compared to my skills), and of course going to meetings. She hasn’t even had time to have many nightcaps with friends which is odd! I gather that she is working to get both horse trials rolling, but what do I know? I’m just an elephant-deprived dachshund.

Earlier this week, Mom left the house really early and drove her car for about three hours to meet with Mr. Maui Jim. I know that’s not his name, but it’s all I can remember. I met him last summer when he and Mrs. Jim came over one day for nightcaps, (like THAT”S supposed to make sense?). At the time, he said I was extraordinarily handsome so even though he didn’t give me any cookies, I liked him and thought he had very sophisticated taste. Did you know that Maui Jim is actually a parrot who lives on Maui and is called Jimmy? I didn’t know that. He’s apparently kind of mean, and on his website it says he likes to bark and get his Dad’s dogs all stirred up. As tough and brave as I am, though, I’ll bet he wouldn’t dare be mean to me! If I can’t have an elephant, maybe Mom will go to Maui and bring me Jimmy. I’d make him ride me around the house to annoy Bruiser and Sluggers and confuse Mom’s house birds (which as dumb as they are, is like shooting fish in a barrel. No challenge at all!). Anyway, Mom was really happy because Mr. Jim agreed to be one of the sponsors of the AEC’s. She said they had a great meeting. I wonder if they make dachshund sized polarized sun glasses at Maui Jim? It gets pretty bright here in the summertime. She also said they went to a great place and ate really good cheeseburgers – but did she bring me one? Not even a crumb so I’m pretty bummed out.

As I said before, Mom went to two events last month and was an FEI Steward at both of them. Now there is a word that confuses me. After I mistook “Thailand” for “Tie Land” in an earlier Blog. I feel I have to be really careful to get words exactly right, but when they sound the same, it’s easy to get mixed up. For example – one of Mom’s and my great friends is named Kyra Stuart. She’s a neat lady who sends me cookies. Mom also has a blanket that’s Stewart plaid. Now really, how am I expected to keep Steward, Stuart and Stewart straight? Can anyone out there help me sort it all out?

Anyway, Mom said that the two events she went to were Southern Pines, (which is actually in North Carolina, another example of how illogical human-speak is), and Poplar Place in Georgia. She said it was very cold and rainy at the first one, and hot the next week at the second, but they were both great events with a lot of good horses. In both places, many people told Mom how much they like my Blog which of course makes me feel very proud. She said that the only bad thing that happened was an accident in which a friend of hers named Ralph something or other ended up flying to the hospital in a helicopter because he had broken many bones. This is very sad, and I hope he gets better really soon. I’ve never met him, but Mom says he’s a lot of fun. I’d love to ride in a helicopter, but not with broken bones. Ick!

Well, it’s getting close to feeding time, and I have to go stand by Mom’s desk with the others and practice some of my latest Pathetic Starving Dachshund sounds and facial expressions. It usually doesn’t work, but just every so often, she’ll feed us just to get some peace and quiet. She is busy writing her column for the USEA magazine which I have to admit, is something that really ticks me off. With the success of this Blog, and with my worldly wit and wisdom, I really feel I should have been asked by Fleeceworks to write it, but it just didn’t work out that way. Oh well, what goes around comes around!

Remember to send cookies – and if you happen to hear about an elephant that needs a home, e mail me at gobi@aecatlamplight.org.

Happy spring.

Lots of love,

Gobi